stuff my grandmother says

I wrote a piece for about if it is possible to be happy and single, inspired by a conversation with my Yiayia (my Greek grandmother). An additional plus was doing a short talk on ABC Radio Adelaide this afternoon about this underlying mentality that still exists that says: sure you can be happy and single but it’s not real happiness.  

Because nothing I do goes seamlessly well (exhibit A: my life) this is how it went down:

1. Claire finds out she will be doing an interview in an hours time. Runs around the house alternating between yodelling and drinking tea to ‘prepare’ her voice (and calm her nerves).

2. Claire sits staring at the telephone in front of her waiting for ABC to call. It rings and she spills tea on her lap. Claire answers:

“Hi this is Mike from the blah blah group and we’re conducting a survey on-“

Claire: No time, Mike, I’m getting interviewed for radio. Call back!

3. Phone rings at exact time as mobile starts ringing. One is ABC, one is father. ABC wins. In order to shush mobile Claire shoves it between couch cushions.

4. Live to air discussion happens. Claire does her thing and manages to use the phrase ‘find something to fill that hole’ when talking about single people. She hopes no one picks up on this. Radio host picks up on this.

5. Halfway through interview Claire hears annoying beeping sound and realises hands-free phone is almost out of battery. Runs frantically around house trying to find the other phone whilst answering questions live to air. Finds phone and tries to work out how to switch between them without hanging up on the good people of Adelaide. Works it out.

6. Interview ends. Claire collapses happy on the couch.

7. Mike from the blah blah group calls back and Claire is happy to do survey because she is a kind-hearted and supportive beast who once worked in a call centre and knows how traumatic this experience is.

Mike: Now before we start, do you or anyone you know work as journalists or with TV or radio?

Claire answers in the affirmative.

Mike: Sorry, you’re not suitable for our survey.

Hangs up.

Claire sighs and can’t remember where she put her mobile.

And thus ends another exciting adventure in Days of Claire’s Life.

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